Leagues

I've never liked the idea of leagues.  "He's out of your league", "She's out of his league", or "He'd never be interested in me, he's out of my league" - I don't like this saying because it promotes the idea that you or someone else isn't good enough or not worthy enough to fall in love with - which to me is complete bullshit.

I have always believed that you can fall in love with anyone.  That is in no way a judgement of your morality or promiscuity, love and lust are not the same thing and where the former is concerned the truth is that Love really is blind.  If you base your potential relationships purely on what someone looks like or the lust you feel when you first meet them, that relationship is doomed to failure in my eyes.  Lust is like hunger, once satisfied the sensation dies.  Love is never satisfied, Love always leaves you wanting more.  To be entirely crude, lust is the want for sex, once fulfilled the object of lust is no longer needed - Love is the desire that remains, you have sex and you hold one another and want to stay in that moment forever more.  Of course in practice you can't do that, but Love is not defined by sex, you can love anyone or anything, you can love people you would never have sex with, and love things it's not even possible to have sex with . . . hmm don't dwell on the semantics of that one too long . . .

The point I was trying to make is that today a guy told me they liked a guy he had met and I said that he should show him rather than telling me, his response was that he didn't want to, because this guy was out of his league, that they'd probably end up being just friends.  Love is blind, sometimes it has to bump into something for it to realise.  If you stand still and refuse to explore the world around you, the chances of Love finding you are going to be very slim.  You need to give Love a chance.  Of the people I know in relationships the longest have been those that knew each other first, and fell in love.  There is a string of failed relationships that I have seen that all began with people who met for the sole purpose of sex.

I'm not singling out the gay community here, if you have any preconceptions about gay people being more promiscuous than straights I'd ask you to drop them now, the only reason this lie is perpetuated is that gay promiscuity is more visible, probably in part due to what seems to be the world's preoccupation with what gay people do with one another.  I've always thought that was displacement really, people being preoccupied with gay sex and making it an issue because their own sex lives are so disturbed they feel guilt they need to project onto others - just look at the Catholic Church.

Straight people are equally as promiscuous and I have seen many guys and girls too who sleep around, having countless one night stands and flings.  This post has become somewhat of a condescending rant, which wasn't the intention, but I can't help but feel that people need to stop judging themselves so harshly.  We judge ourselves with such temerity convincing ourselves that others judge us cruelly when in reality, most people couldn't give a shit.  We are incredibly self absorbed, that we refuse to admit that even to ourselves.  We project judgement, not at others, but at ourselves because we feel that's the way others will treat us.  No-one is "out of your league"

- And I do realise it may seem as though I am getting ahead of myself, jumping straight to 'Love' when discussing dating or even just meeting someone.  Really though, 'Like' and 'Love' are two points on the same scale, they may be a fair bit apart but Love is one extreme of the scale, the end goal, equally hate and dislike are the opposites but also part of the same scale.