Self Interest

Do you consume your own content?  This might sound like an odd question to ask, but there is something deeper at play when you ask it of a person.  If you are a creative person who is involved in the production of content for consumption, there is inevitably the question of whether you consume your own content.  For example, does a singer listen to their own music?  Does a game developer play their own game?  Does a chef eat their own food?

Those three questions demonstrate the concept but the perception of those three isn't equal.  Asking if a chef eats their own food seems like the most asinine, you would assume the answer is obviously yes they do.  That's not exactly clear however whether it is true in practice.  There are celebrity chefs here in the UK, one in particular who I won't name who has a vehement objection to junk food who could be considered to be on a crusade to eliminate it - the same chef is fat, and clearly does not eat healthy food all the time, or even in moderation.  They didn't get that way eating the healthy balanced food they supposedly advocate.

Asking if a game developer plays their own games seems less asinine and more inquisitive because there is no instinctual answer.  As for the singer, in their case there comes into play the concept of self indulgence and ego tripping, to the point where many people would actually find it egotistical if a singer actually said yes they did listen to their own music.

Beyond the disparity in perception, the very nature of the question ultimately comes down to something more fundamental - do you find yourself interesting?  That's the real question that is being asked, as you and your work are inevitably associated to the extent that people perceive your work to be a definition of who you are as a person.  If you create content that is dark, sombre, macabre, or noir, then people assume that's a representation of your personality, and that it indicates how you would be in life if they knew you.  Whether or not this assumption and association is fair, isn't easy to answer.

For me personally, my work often revolves around what other people want.  The only exceptions to this would be my writing which is something I write for myself first and foremost and if others find it interesting then that is a bonus.  With regards to my writing, I have to consume my own content at times for the sake of proof reading etc, but I also consume it at other times too.  I often look back on the things I wrote long ago to see how I have grown as a person, to see how my style has changed, and to an extent to get a glimpse into my mindset of that moment.  The odd word or phrase that pops up in passing indicates thoughts and feelings that were prevalent in my head at the time.

As far as the work I create for other people is concerned, I rarely consume that content, if at all.  In almost all situations it is created for someone else's purpose, to cater to their interests, and to be a representation of them not of me.  If you relied on that as an indicator of who I am or what I am really like, you'd likely build up a representation that was the furthest thing from accurate as you can get.

Going back to the original question then, perhaps the answer can simply be defined by another question - who was that content created for?  Still of all the question that underpins this whole inquiry is whether or not you find yourself interesting.  I would like to think that most people do find themselves interesting, but I'm not exactly sure if that is a fair approximation, this is something I need to delve into a little deeper.