The End And The Beginning

Every cliché fairy tale ends with the words "they lived happily ever after" - despite the fact the fairy tales compiled by the Brothers Grimm from whom we get most of our fairy tales never actually ended with those words, in fact I've written before how, many of those fairy tales were actually quite dark and disturbing.  Still the idea that everything works out in the end is something that we try to hold onto in life, even when we have no evidence that points to that conclusion and we may even have a mountain of it that points to the opposite conclusion.

"They lived okay ever after" doesn't have the same ring to it, and there is a perception no-one would actually enjoy a story that ended with "And then they all died" or "The lived miserably ever after" - although I have to question whether that is really true, as I mentioned around Halloween most movies that focus on that time period or are released around then actively lead to those types of ending, the only difference being that there is a sort of schadenfreude that drives the desire to watch horror movies and scary movies, there's a strange juxtaposition that occurs where you're not satisfied as a viewer if it doesn't end badly.

I think one of the reasons why that cliché emerged and became so prevalent is because fairy tales are meant to depict a fantasy world, and people feel most comfortable with fantasy when it is unrealistic, on some level there is an understanding that life usually doesn't end happily, in fact when you stop and think about the fact that most people fear death, then the end of life is inherently something which as a society we don't view as being something happy.  The idea of laughing at a funeral is intensely uncomfortable, even the concept of having a celebration of someone's life, with an actual party would be met with judgement from most people - at least from a western perspective, there are cultures where this is actually their practice when someone dies.

When we watch movies or TV shows, we always want to know how it ends.  Even if we lose interest in the show itself or the plot or everything else, we often see it through to the end just to see how it ends and get closure.  Life doesn't always give us that blessing, we lose people before we are ready, we don't always get a chance to say goodbye, we think of everything we wish we had the chance to tell them when they were still alive when they are gone.  I love many people and I am sure that they know how much I love them, I know how much they love me, if I should die before them I think they'd know how I felt, and I think they'd know that I felt the love they showed for me, I wouldn't want them to regret anything.

In life all you can do is to do the best you can do.  In the moment we make choices and we make decisions based on what we think is right, and you should never regret those choices.  There will be things that you wish you had not done, or that you would never do again, but don't judge your past self and your decisions you made by what you know now and the experience you have gained, it's not fair on yourself to do this, everyone's vision is perfect in hindsight, but in the moment you can only do what you feel is right based on what you know.

2019 will come to an end, and 2020 will start anew, there is a belief that with the turn of the year that you should create resolutions and make changes but the truth is every day you live a life that is filled with choice, you don't have to wait for one special day each year to make a choice or to make a change, you can do it at any time.  Don't mourn the loss of the past, don't worry about the problems of the future, celebrate the present for it is a gift and as long as you live it is a gift that you are blessed with every single day, every hour, every minute, every second, it is the best gift you will ever receive and it is entirely up to you what you do with it.  So let go of the past, forget the future and live for today.

Happy New Year.