Music Monday #39: Northern Star by Melanie C

The 90s for me like many were dominated by pop groups, coupled with Eurodance and to a lesser extent power ballads but those were in decline after experiencing their golden age in the 80s.  You can't talk about pop in the UK in the 90s without mentioning the Spice Girls, a group that was in many regards ground-breaking, award winning, and by any definition a juggernaut.  When the group eventually split up, it happened at first with the departure of Geri Halliwell after which the four remaining girls continued but eventually went their own ways too.  They each pursued solo careers for a time with varying success, but in my mind the artist who had the greatest success as a singer beyond their time in the Spice Girls was Melanie Chisholm, better known simply as Mel C.

Mel C's solo career began with her first solo album 'Northern Star' released in 1999 which still remains my favourite album she put out but this isn't surprising given that William Orbit helped produce the album a legend within the EDM scene who a year prior had produced 'Ray Of Light' for Madonna.  The album mixes genres and it's hard to pin it down to just one for that reason.  Another producer involved in the album was Rick Nowels, another music industry legend who coincidentally co-wrote 'The Power Of Goodbye' with Madonna for Ray Of Light, not only this he has worked with many artists through the decades including Belinda Carlisle who gets an honourable mention here, in particular for her 'Heaven On Earth' album which features two of my favourite songs by her 'Heaven Is A Place On Earth' and ' Circles In The Sand' both of which Rick Nowels wrote.  Belinda was one of the artists that fell just short of being featured on this list in a post of her own.

Northern Star therefore has a pedigree attached to it that set it up to be a production that I was destined to fall in love with, not to be contrived but the stars really did align for this album for me.  'I Turn To You' is my favourite track on the album which features twice, first in its original incarnation but secondly as a remix by the inestimable Hex Hector.  This isn't the remix I alluded to in a previous post, there is one more artist to come with whom Hex Hector worked. 

Hex Hector's remix of 'I Turn To You' is one of my favourite remixes of all time.  I was too young at the time to experience clubs or the gay scene in particular but this is a track I would have happily danced the night away to.  The lyrics I have to resist posting in full because the entire song from start to finish speaks to me, every word, I wouldn't change a thing about it.  Having said that, right from the start the opening verse "When the world is darker than I can understand, When nothing turns out the way I planned, When the sky turns grey and there's no end in sight, When I can't sleep through the lonely night" my God if an artist ever captured the way I feel about the world at times this was the moment that summed it up so succinctly.  This was another track that grew in meaning for me over time, this track I connected with instantly but it would not be for several years before those words sank in so deeply and became a part of my life.  Even now in 2020 with everything I have been through the lyrics are still forming deeper connections to my life, "When my insides are wracked with anxiety, You have the touch that will quiet me, You lift my spirit, You melt the ice, When I need inspiration, when I need advice" this speaks even now to my recent struggle with anxiety, and the episodes of depression I have been through and through it all I search for "you" which as I have mentioned in previous posts is a word in love songs that takes on many different meanings for me, sometimes it refers to a romantic or platonic love, sometimes it refers to the search for your true inner self, and in some cases it can refer to the search for a higher power to give you strength which in this case this is the meaning attributed to it for me, "you" in this song is the Universe, not a God or a deity or spiritual entity, but the Universe itself and the benevolence that is inherent within it that has been there for me at times when I have stopped fighting it and given in to it - "I turn to you. Like a flower leaning toward the sun, I turn to you, 'Cos you're the only one, Who can turn me around when I'm upside down, I turn to you"

Northern Star is an album that crosses many genres but it also crosses many emotions too, from the mixture of happiness and longing that 'I Turn To You' embodies, to the anger that 'Goin' Down' articulates, once more at a time when I couldn't find the words to express myself I turned to music, "How come I didn't see, You were making fun of me?  How dare you change the rules?  You made me look a fool, Well, now you're gonna see, The last laugh's not on me" these words expressed my anger for people that I felt had manipulated me with their childhood games and their twisted words that tried to pull my strings like a puppet to make me dance, "Now I feel no remorse, My life is back on course, From this little hitch, I have become a super bitch, But don't be afraid, By the confession I made, I am not a whore, I have, have, have, have, You're goin' down" these lyrics reflected the change that occurred in me near the end of my teenage years where I was angry at the world and rather than feeling hard done by it, I wanted revenge, spite drove me forward in my life for a time. 

I would also like to take a moment here to say the official lyrics to 'Goin Down' as quoted above say "I have, have, have, have" but this isn't what I hear when Mel C sings, and this is one of those instances where you can chalk it up to misheard lyrics but for the longest time I thought she scream "I have got my pride" in anger in that line, which to me fits the song more, and I still think of those as the actual lyrics, listen for yourself and be the judge, this may be a case of Yanny/Laurel but it remains a point of contention that misheard lyrics can still leave and impression on you, it's what they make you feel that matters, to quote Rob Thomas from his song 'Little Wonders' he said "Let your clarity define you; In the end, We will only just remember how it feels" this track was part of the soundtrack to Disney's 'Meet The Robinsons' and references the plot of the movie without giving spoilers a young boy named Lewis sought to understand his past but in the end realises that his past doesn't matter all that matters is how it made him feel because that's all you remember in the end.

I could write about every single track on this album because I love them all, but I wanted to mention one more specifically and that is 'Never Be the Same Again' a duet with Lisa Lopes which still holds a special place in my heart with meaning that has evolved over time.  The song is about moving on, about new beginnings and rebirth, the first time this song really came into its own for me was when I came out, the lyrics "It's just the beginning it's not the end, Things will never be the same again, It's not a secret anymore, Now we've opened up the door" and "I can't believe it took me quite so long, To take the forbidden step, Is this something that I might regret?" speak volumes to the maelstrom of emotions you pass through in those moments when you first come out, the mixture of freedom and liberation but also the realisation of transformation and the fact that everything changes, except sometimes it doesn't, sometimes you realise you built it up to be more than you thought.  Either way, the lyrics have grown with me and Northern Star in many regards as an album serves as yet another example of music that I return to often to see how much I have grown as a person, to see what connects with me that did not connect before with new experiences behind me from the life I have lived.

In case it wasn't clear by now, I advocate the exploration of our music libraries in this way.  When you rely on playlists there is a tendency to play the same 6 songs on repeat but your music collect grows and whilst certain tracks and albums may have meant something to you at the time, it's a journey to be experienced by exploring them all over again.  There are artists that I liked, but grew to love, and even artists I hated at the time who never entered into my radar who when I heard their music later in life I formed a connection and an understanding that had gone over my head at the time leading me to including them in my collection.  There are albums I have bought years, and in some cases decades after they were released, and a fair few released before I was even born.  There is so much to explore and so much to discover, not just from an outward perspective but from an inward perspective too, so I highly recommend taking the time to reconnect with some of the music in your collection.